Beaneath The Skin


” For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” Psalm 139:13

Today, my vision got a little clearer, and I had a lot put into perspective. For years, my husband has been telling me the damaging effects of being in the beauty industry. Yes, he supports me in all that I do, but never encouraged being put in a position of being constantly compared or told that you weren’t quite good enough. I ignored it initially, after all, I was just having fun with it? I never took it seriously enough to let those things get to me.. until it started happening.

We were never made to live this way.. in constant comparison to each other, but unfortunately, that is what social media and media in general has done to us! Even if we don’t admit that we fall into this category, subconsciously, we think it, and we feel it to a degree. Growing up, especially in middle school, I was constantly picked on for my appearance. The classic “ginger” jokes if you will. I carried some of that pain with me all through high school and it was damaging to my relationships and all in all was slowly destroying my opinion of myself. That should NEVER happen.

God never created us to be so self centered. Who are we to think we deserve certain titles or positions? I was humbled by this realization today. I always had my husbands wise words in the back of my mind, questioning if modeling was right for me, but kept pushing forward , for what? What fulfillment other than self-centeredness, and ego, could modeling possibly give to me? But it isn’t and shouldn’t be about ” me, me ,me “. That’s the problem. Recently, I have been given opportunities that I thought were going to be somewhat of a “stepping stone”, but God decided to intervene. He said, no. Initially, my ego took it very hard, and I made a few phone calls to vent.  I didn’t want to believe that after all my efforts that it wasn’t going to work out for me. At least, not the way I intended.

Then, amazingly, something happened, and I had this strong urge and motivation to share. I decided that I am fed up with being judged, compared and told , “yeah , you’re good, but THIS girl.” No, you don’t get to sum up my worth, and try to discourage me. I am feeling more at peace with acceptance of the fact that I am free of that judgment and nobodies opinion of me is even held to any sort of importance. I am who I am, and I was created for a purpose, not for self, but for others. All this time, instead of taking it personally, I should’ve been thanking God. We pray all the time for God to lead and direct us, and here I have been pouting and getting mad it wasn’t working out for me. Well, maybe that’s because God doesn’t want me to self serve, but to serve others.

No, I don’t know where to begin, but I know that I am going to continue to let The Spirit speak, and direct me , and I intend on fully listening and obeying this time. Thank you God for this realization.

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:14

 

 

 

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Beneath The Skin


” For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” Psalm 139:13
Today, my vision got a little clearer, and I had a lot put into perspective. For years, my husband has been telling me the damaging effects of being in the beauty industry. Yes, he supports me in all that I do, but never encouraged being put in a position of being constantly compared or told that you weren’t quite good enough. I ignored it initially, after all, I was just having fun with it? I never took it seriously enough to let those things get to me.. until it started happening. 

We were never made to live this way.. in constant comparison to each other, but unfortunately, that is what social media and media in general is doing to us! Even if we don’t admit that we fall into this category; subconsciously, we think it, and we feel it to a degree. Growing up, especially in middle school, I was constantly picked on for my appearance. The classic “ginger” jokes if you will. I carried some of that pain with me all through high school, and it was damaging to my relationships. This subconcious critic was slowly destroying my opinion of myself. That should NEVER happen. 

God never created us to be so self centered. Who are we to think we deserve certain titles or positions? I was humbled by this realization today. I always had my husband’s wise words in the back of my mind, questioning me if modeling was a safe bet to place the perception of my self worth. Despite this, I continued pushing forward, but for what? What fulfillment, other than self-centered egoic satisfaction, could modeling possibly give me? This was the moment God’s Spirit softly reminded me; life isn’t, and shouldn’t be about “me, me ,me .” That’s the problem.

     Recently, I have been given opportunities that I thought were going to be somewhat of a “stepping stone,” but God decided to intervene. He lovingly said, “No.” Initially, my ego took it very hard, and I made a few phone calls to vent. I didn’t want to believe that after all my efforts, all the sacrifices, it wasn’t going to work out for me. What I failed to realize, however, is that it will all work out for the good of those who love Christ; it just may be in a way I never expected.

Amazingly, in that moment, something happened, and I was given this strong motivation to share. I decided that I am fed up with being judged, compared, and getting the same message.. “Yeah , you’re good and all, but THIS girl.” No! You don’t get to sum up my worth, or classify me. 
This moment of clarity gave me such serenity! I am so full of peace! I am who I am, and I was created for a purpose; not for self, but for others. All this time, instead of taking it personally, I should have been thanking God! We pray all the time for God to lead, to direct us, and here I have been pouting about the fact that feeding my ego just isn’t working out for me.. Well, maybe that’s because God doesn’t want me to serve self, but to serve others. 
No, I don’t know where to begin, but I know that I am going to continue to let The Spirit speak, direct me, and I will try with all my heart listen and obey this time. Thank you God for this realization.
  
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:14

He Cleanses 


Last night, on our way back home from West Virginia, Caleb decided to stop at the store for a few last minute things. I had discussed with him on the way home that I was continuing to have a hard time with my anxiety and I just didn’t know how I was going to shake it, that I wanted to seek out more help because I cannot continue to live this way. 

When we arrived home, to my surprise, he pulled out two books. He said that he had prayed and really felt the spirit moving him to grab a particular two. I immediately went to get my reading glasses, made some hot chocolate and curled up into bed to start getting some answers. The entire time that I’ve gone through this I had never looked at it in the way that the book explained. – 

Spend a moment in solemn reflection. What is the ” dross ” in your life that needs to be purged? It may be arrogance, pride, love of praise, love attention, self-will, stubbornness, an unteachable spirit, peevishness, immaturity, jealousy, anger, impatience, love of money, selfishness, or an unforgiving spirit. All such “dross” grieves the Holy Spirit who dwells within us and so we must be “refined” and “purged”. This means that we must “pass through the fire “, but there is some comfort for you here.

The book also explained how God does not put us through these things to consume us but to bring out the beauty in us. When we commit our life to Christ, the Holy Spirit lives within us, but, when we are filled with dross, He cannot truly live there , so what does He do? He cleanses .  These three facts brought me so much comfort, and I hope that they will to you as well if you are now facing your fiery trial. 

*First, he is never harmed by the fire can you tell me that you were ever harmed by gods fastening? Oh, this doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt, but always the hurt is for our good.

* Second, the fire sets free from the shackles of carnality that hindered. The most radiant Christians are the ones who have suffered the most.

* Third, God’s presence is very real and precious in the fire.

These three things helped me so much and reassured me that He is not consuming me but the “dross ” out of my life so that I may be purified and cleansed. What an amazing realization. I also began journaling, as the book you see, Fervent, is a battle plan for strategic prayer. I highly recommend this and will definitely blog about how it has helped me and what it has put into perspective. I’m already learning so much and I can’t wait to share it with you.

  
Quotes and text shared from -Comfort for troubled Christians by J.C. Brumfield 

Home For The Holidays


Well, it’s safe to say this holiday was a great one, but as always, it has flown by ! 
I was fortunate enough to be able to spend most of last week with my family and friends. I always love being able to go home. As you all know I am very much a homebody! Christmas Eve we went to my grandmas and had dinner with the family and then carried on the tradition of watching National Lampoon Christmas vacation in the evening and then 24 hours of a Christmas Story . Before my sweet husband , my sister and I would cuddle up in my bed and watch the marathon all night until Christmas morning . It was so exciting , but being able to anticipate it with my husband is just as beautiful and wonderful. This was the first year I could hardly sleep because I was TOO excited to give everyone else their gifts . It felt great that Caleb and I were able to bless others this year. The gift of giving truly is a lot more enjoyable than receiving .  
   

  

  
I mean, look at this moment . Priceless . My dad surprised Caleb and gave him his first ever muzzleloader . Caleb was definitely caught off guard but thrilled to be receiving something so sentimental. You can just feel the emotion through the picture . 

   
   
After enjoying the morning with my dad and his family , I got ready and went to my aunts briefly to exchange gifts , where I got to visit my little love . 
  

 
That night , we went to spend the night with Calebs parents where we exchanged gifts there as well. 

   
 
   
   
    

  I think we had some pretty great facial expressions. What do you guys think? 
All in all , it was a very eventful, exhausting , blessed and exciting Christmas Holiday!  If you were wondering about my attire on Christmas Eve , here are a few of the details .

   
 
  
Shirt – buckle ( it was a gift) I usually wouldn’t even look at this store , as I personally think it’s overrated and overpriced . 

Skirt/ Charlotte Russe 

Nude heels- Forever21 ( they always have great deals on shoes )
What are some of your favorite Christmas traditions/ favorite moment this season ?
Merry Christmas! Xoxo

A Son Was Given


A Son Was Given 
In a broad sense God is omnipresent, which means that everywhere we go, He is there. But if we really want God with us, and more specifically, if we want Christ living in our hearts, then we must turn from our sin and believe in Him. 
The beautiful baby in the manger came with an express purpose, and that was to die for the sins of the world. The birth of Jesus was so there would be the death of Jesus and, ultimately, the resurrection of Jesus. He was born to die so that we might live. 
I personally know the pain of losing a child. And I think, for a parent, there is no greater pain than this. God knows all about that. He knows what it is like to lose a child. We talk about the sacrifice of Jesus, and justly so, as He came to this earth, laid aside His privileges of deity, and voluntarily went to a cross and died for the sins of the world. But let’s not forget the sacrifice of the Father who watched His Son enter this world. 

Isaiah 9:6 sums it up perfectly: “For unto us a Child is born, unto us a Son is given; and the government will be upon His shoulder. And His name will be called Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” 
That gives us the perspective of both heaven and earth. From earth’s perspective, unto us a child was born. That is what we celebrate at Christmas. But from heaven’s perspective, unto us a Son is given. The Father sent the Son. He did this because He loves all of us, because He wants us to have the ultimate gift: the gift of eternal life. It’s the only gift that keeps on giving. 

  
Summary sentence: The gift of eternal life is the only gift that keeps on giving!

This devo is from the – Youversion bible app devotions . 
Merry Christmas to you all! To follow me on all my adventures and this holiday season, you can find me on Instagram at @thefreckledfoxx 

Xoxoxo

Nutcracker


Last night was pretty magical. My husband, his family and I went to go and see the Nutcracker​. 

Living in the city has been quite an adjustment for me, it’s a very fast paced lifestyle compared to what I was used to as you could imagine. But I couldn’t help to think to myself last night ..driving through the city on the way to the show, how beautiful and how blessed we are to be in the position we are in. How I do hope to be back to my country roads in the near future, I know that God is just preparing us for His plan. He knows that I’ve always been very comfortable and a homebody and I just have to remember that this is His way of pushing me out of my comfort zone. Every time I get anxious, I just remind myself of that fact. It truly is a beautiful city and I was blessed to spend this time with them. 

 It was an absolutely beautiful show, and I had never been in the Benedum center so I was blown away by the beauty of the building. 

  
I was blessed enough to be able to wear a vintage dress that my husband purchased for me over two years ago. Check out Quinn Edgells vintage clothing line- FEATHERED. All of her items are absolutely beautiful and reasonably priced for the quality of what you are getting .  Having lived in West Virginia, there was just nowhere to wear such a beautiful and extravagant dress . 

  
But I would say last night was very fitting. Need to even mention how gorgeous my husband looked ?  I couldn’t quit staring at him all night.

Dress – 1960s vintage ivory sequin dress from feathered . Check them out on etsy! 
Glossy nude heels- forever21 

I really couldn’t justify spending money on getting my hair done with my background experience in cosmetology, so I thought why not wing it and try an updo myself! This hair-do you was very simple and easy, if you’re interested in a tutorial comment below.

  
Lough family ❤️

Fear Not 


God Works Great Things Even Through Small People 
What a change takes place in your mind and imagination when it dawns on you that you are not the star of your own play, when it dawns on you that you are actually working for God and not vice versa. You are an employee in his company! That means that he sets up your job description, assigns you a salary, and determines your benefit package. 
What a relief it is when it dawns on you that your earthly life is not the be-all and end-all. This is training time. God is using us as he needs us, and we often can’t see our influence or roles clearly. Sometimes we serve his agenda by being strong, sometimes by being broken. Sometimes we serve his agenda by being famous as achievers and sometimes by “failing.” What matters is to accept his guidance eagerly and accept his place and opportunities in life cheerfully. 
Here is the bright hope that draws us on: “Instead of their shame my people will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace they will rejoice in their inheritance; and so they will inherit a double portion in their land, and everlasting joy will be theirs” (Isaiah 61:7). 
God always gets the last word. Even when you feel like a failure now, his last word is Winner!

  
This devotion brought to you by the youversion bible app. The fear not devotional. 

Merry Christmas Eve Eve ! Xoxox 

I hope that everybody has a beautiful holiday and remembers the reason for the season.